The Pet Store Chronicles
I (unfortunately) work at chain pet store, where we sell rodents, birds, ferrets, rabbits, arachnids, reptiles, amphibians, and fish. My official title is "animal caretaker." Being the "animal person," a lot of people ask me questions about their pets.
There are some things that I get asked that either make me want to cry, or laugh hysterically. I'd like to share some of these encounters with people who would appreciate it
I'd like to start a little journal, and update every time I encounter something ridiculous.
Hope you all get a laugh! However, sometimes, you might get frustrated or even saddened (I must admit, I have somewhat lost my faith in humanity because of this job).
I'd like to start with something funny-- probably the most hysterical thing that has ever happened to me at the store.
This is roughly how it happened (almost 8 months ago).
A man comes in, very determined:
Man: I want the chinchilla and the iguana.
Me: OK, well, do you have everything you need to house each of them?
Man: I need something really big.
Me: Well, yes, that is true for both the chinchilla and iguana. The iguana can get very big. The chinchilla just needs a lot of room. Let me show you something for the iguana, then I'll show you what you will need for the chinchilla.
Man: What do you mean? I'm going to put them together.
Me: *mouth drops open* What??
Man: I saw it on Dora the Explorer! They are both from South America! I am going to make *man spreads his arms and legs wide* AN ECOSYSTEM!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't exactly remember how I talked him out of it, but he left with nothing.
That is....just awesome.
Not pet store related..but...
Man comes up to me.
"Hey i'm thinking of getting one of the those Wii systems. Can it play xbox 360 games?" I just kinda stare....
I use to work in a pet store so I have a few of these stories myself. A common one was people asking for african chicklets. One woman who was afraid of fish. She would get crickets for her lizards and would not come through the fish room to get to the small animal area. And my favorite. Invisible fish. When ever we had an empty tank someone would ask want was in it, so we would say "invisible fish, see." "oh, yeah! I see them!"
LOL Keep em comin guys! Great idea for a thread!
Unrelated to animals, but still quite funny.
At the store, we have a frequent buyer program with dog and cat food-- buy 10 bags within 1 year, get the 11th free. You have to sign up to do this, and there's a contract-ish thing you sign that tells you all the rules of the program. The store keeps one copy, the customer keeps another. In order to redeem your 11th bag, you need all the receipts from the purchases of the bags as well as the UPC cut off from the bag.
A woman comes in with just her receipts. When we tell her she needs the UPCs too...
Woman: No one told me you needed them bar code things too!
Me: It's clearly stated on the contract that you need the receipts and the UPCs.
Woman: No one told me to READ the darn thing!!
Most people never read what they sign. And most people lack common sence too. All you need to do is tell someone to 'sign here' and then you have thier house, car, paycheck and soul too.
I had a lady come in the other day asking about crickets..
HER: These things never last that long, maybe 2-3 days..
ME: well do you give them food or a source of water?
HER: What!? You have to feed them?
ME: Well yes, they are living creatures if you dont do that they wil die.
HER: wow, I didnt know that!
ME: (just staring like really? are you seriously that stupid?)
... women still comes in complaining they dont last long
"May the holes in your net be no larger than the fish in it"
55g FW Planted Community
Gerbils: Samsonite, Latte, Jasper, Pixel, Spice, Macchiato, Barceló, Kuhlua
Maine Coon Mix: Camo
Blue Heeler Cattledog: Arro
It's been a while! Ever since I started at a more reputable pet store in a better neighborhood, the people are a lot less... silly.
But I had a good one today.
Basically a man came in asking for a goldfish that doesn't grow... ended up telling me how healthy his fish (the kind that don't grow) were because they swim upside down... and how his goldfish lived a long healthy 2 years before she died.
*smile and give fish. whisper "sorry" to fish*
If anyone tried to pull this with a dog or cat, they would be thrown in prison. Why is doing it to a fish OK?