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Deleted User
12-09-2009, 07:26 PM
This is a specially formulated diet that has been designed by expert nutritionists to help you cope during times of stress.


Breakfast

Half a grapefruit
One slice of wholegrain toast
One cup of skimmed milk

Lunch

Small portion of lean, steamed chicken with fresh spinach
One cup of herbal tea
One chocolate Hobnob

Afternoon tea

The rest of the packet of chocolate Hobnobs
One tub of Haagen-Dazs ice cream with choc-chip topping
One family packet of Jaffa Cakes

Dinner

Four bottles of wine (red or white or pink….whatever)
Two loaves of garlic bread
One family size pizza
Three Snickers bars

Late night snack

One whole frozen Sara Lee cheesecake (eaten directly from the freezer)


Remember…… ‘Stress Diet’ Rules:

If no one sees you eat something, it has no calories.
When drinking a diet Coke with a chocolate bar, the ‘diet’ bit of the Coke cancels out the sugar in the chocolate.
When you eat with someone else, calories don’t count if you do not eat more than they do.
Food used for medical purposes does not count (eg hot chocolate, toast, cheesecake and vodka)
If you fatten up the people around you, you will look thinner.
Cinema related foods have zero calorie count as they are part of the entertainment package.
Food licked from utensils has no fat if you are in the process of cooking

Rue
12-09-2009, 10:02 PM
LOL...maybe I need to change my diet...I am loosing weight, but my stress levels are on the rise...:hmm3grin2orange:

MCHRKiller
12-10-2009, 12:10 AM
lol, frozen cheesecake is better right out of the freezer still frozen. Ive lost 5lbs since I started the new job...not from stress but due to the fact that there isnt a food stand 50 yards away without all sorts of deep fried goodness :hmm3grin2orange: