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Lady Hobbs
03-07-2007, 01:22 PM
The Worlds Shortest Fairytale


Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, "Will you marry me?" The girl said


"No," and she lived happily ever after and went shopping, drank martinis


with friends, always had a clean house, never had to cook, had a closet


full of shoes and handbags, stayed skinny, and was never farted on.


The End.
*Sarah*
03-07-2007, 01:29 PM
LOL! That's cute!
Abbeys_Mom
03-07-2007, 01:43 PM
lol. I like the part about not being farted on (although I have never had my Husband do that).
nikipate
03-07-2007, 02:08 PM
That's great!!! LOL and sooooo true to boot......
jeffs99dime
03-07-2007, 03:05 PM
and the moral of this story is what exactly? lol
Chrona
03-07-2007, 03:20 PM
That guys are evil of course. :rolleyes:
jeffs99dime
03-07-2007, 03:24 PM
That guys are evil of course. :rolleyes:

that's better than being psychotic like women. lol
nikipate
03-07-2007, 03:32 PM
that's better than being psychotic like women. lol

You know you guys can't live without us!!:hmm3grin2orange:
Chrona
03-07-2007, 03:36 PM
Who will fix your car or the plumbing if we aren't there huh? HUH? :P
nikipate
03-07-2007, 03:41 PM
Who will fix your car or the plumbing if we aren't there huh? HUH? :P

Actually my mom taught me to change oil, spark plugs, flat tires and things like that.... so there (sticking out my tongue in a truly mature gesture)....
Severus
03-07-2007, 03:52 PM
You know you guys can't live without us!!:hmm3grin2orange:

And vice versa! lol
Chrona
03-07-2007, 03:57 PM
Actually my mom taught me to change oil, spark plugs, flat tires and things like that.... so there (sticking out my tongue in a truly mature gesture)....

Spoilsport :P
xoolooxunny
03-07-2007, 04:50 PM
see what you started hobbs?? Can't we all just get along....I'm just kidding women are crazy and talk my ears off!!!!!!!!
jeffs99dime
03-07-2007, 05:10 PM
see what you started hobbs?? Can't we all just get along....I'm just kidding women are crazy and talk my ears off!!!!!!!!


exactly my point. lol
Lady Hobbs
03-07-2007, 05:36 PM
I just knew it. All you have to do is write "girls only" and all the guys will show up. It's like a post that says "please don't read" and there will be 5000 posts there. Haha
Chrona
03-07-2007, 05:48 PM
Well, the "girls only" title just makes the thread sound scandalous, lol.
Lauren B.
03-07-2007, 07:08 PM
<<and was never farted on.>>

Boy, that truly is a fairy tale!
cartmanis
03-07-2007, 07:36 PM
I believe the line...

"And had 23 cats" was missing form the original post... :)
Incredulous_Ed
03-07-2007, 07:39 PM
I believe the line...

"And had 23 cats" was missing form the original post... :)
haha, that made me laugh so hard!

I resent the fact that you think all men are messy! I keep the house clean!
xoolooxunny
03-07-2007, 07:41 PM
Incredulous_Ed

I resent the fact that you think all men are messy! I keep the house clean!

I have the cleanest room in the house, girls keep such messy rooms!!!!

I will definitely have a "his" & "hers" when it comes to bathrooms as well!!!

EW!
Chrona
03-07-2007, 07:42 PM
I'm waiting for someone to make a feminist comment here :)

In all seriousness though, how often do women get farted on? Am I just out of the loop? I mean, wtf? lol
xoolooxunny
03-07-2007, 07:44 PM
If you were to ask my gf, she would say average, about 10 times a day, half the time while trying to sleep, so you MUST be out of the loop!
Chrona
03-07-2007, 08:03 PM
If you were to ask my gf, she would say average, about 10 times a day, half the time while trying to sleep, so you MUST be out of the loop!

Or....maybe...I just don't fart on people? lol
xoolooxunny
03-07-2007, 08:34 PM
Well, it is an art form that should be taken very seriously. Side effects can include uncontrollable laughter, resulting in shortness of breath. Ask your doctor if farting on people is right for you.
Chrona
03-07-2007, 08:37 PM
Well, it is an art form that should be taken very seriously. Side effects can include uncontrollable laughter, resulting in shortness of breath. Ask your doctor if farting on people is right for you.

lol! :thumb:
Lady Hobbs
03-07-2007, 08:42 PM
Well, it is an art form that should be taken very seriously. Side effects can include uncontrollable laughter, resulting in shortness of breath. Ask your doctor if farting on people is right for you.

ROTFLMAO!

Men sure can get their shackles up if they think they have slightly been offended after years and years of gals hearing how stupid they are, blonde jokes, fat lady jokes, etc, etc.

Gez guys chill out. It was a joke.
Lauren B.
03-08-2007, 12:09 AM
Ask your doctor if farting on people is right for you.

It isn't very often that I laugh outloud at a post.....not just typing in "lol" so the author knows you think they're funny....but an actual physical audible guffaw while reading a post.

The above line made me LAUGH OUT LOUD.
AquaQueen
03-08-2007, 12:34 AM
This thread has got to be one of the funniest I have read you guys are a trip...

For the record I have been farted on my hubby while he was awake and sleeping many times and my boys love to come running from the other room to fart on me then give dad a high five like they did a good deed...lil punks

Out of curiosity I have to ask no one has ever had a golden shower? I truely think that is worse then being farted on...I'd take the fart everyday rather then that...lol
Nautilus29
03-08-2007, 12:51 AM
I never farted on my girlfriend. I was never into all of that farting stuff well maybe in 6th grade but after that it got pretty old.

Oh and the whole changing the spark plugs and oil. Anyone can do that stuff, all you do is take off the spark plugs and put new ones on. Or unfasten a screw let the oil drain out, and then put the screw back on and fill it up.:hmm3grin2orange:
jeffs99dime
03-08-2007, 01:39 AM
and to disspell any myth that says "women don't fart" they most certainly do. they're just self concious about it and they keep it quiet. (s.b.d) lol
Chrona
03-08-2007, 01:43 AM
and to disspell any myth that says "women don't fart" they most certainly do. they're just self concious about it and they keep it quiet. (s.b.d) lol

No way! ;)
jeffs99dime
03-08-2007, 01:44 AM
No way! ;)

yes way!!!!
cocoa_pleco
03-08-2007, 02:02 AM
NO WAY! lol
xoolooxunny
03-08-2007, 02:05 AM
don't any of you watch myth busters??? Of course girls don't fart, they "fluff"!
DUH!!
Chrona
03-08-2007, 02:09 AM
No, they do fart, but it's very dainty and smells like flowers. Thus, when you fart, they are justified in condemning you.
cocoa_pleco
03-08-2007, 02:19 AM
how the hell did we get to talking about this now? lol
xoolooxunny
03-08-2007, 02:20 AM
i stand corrected!
Severus
03-08-2007, 05:15 AM
how the hell did we get to talking about this now? lol

Haha, i guess the thread title kind of provoked it
Incredulous_Ed
03-08-2007, 05:52 AM
and to disspell any myth that says "women don't fart" they most certainly do. they're just self concious about it and they keep it quiet. (s.b.d) lol

They don't keep it a secret all the time. I remember my cousin saying once, "I love to fart, i fart every single day."

Seriously! She said that!
NorthernBoy
03-08-2007, 06:14 AM
actually Hobbs I have to correct your little story...it actually goes like this.

THE WORLD’S SHORTEST FAIRY TALE
Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl “Will you marry me?” The girl said, “NO!” And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing, hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and farted whenever he wanted.
THE END
Lady Hobbs
03-08-2007, 06:26 AM
Yup. It goes both ways.

Is this when all us gals are supposed to get all upset now like the guys did? ppttfff
jeffs99dime
03-08-2007, 02:45 PM
Yup. It goes both ways.

Is this when all us gals are supposed to get all upset now like the guys did? ppttfff

yes. lol!!
Severus
03-08-2007, 04:20 PM
Yup. It goes both ways.

Haha. It certainly does
Incredulous_Ed
03-08-2007, 07:05 PM
that's true. LOL
Hey Severus you have 2222 posts!
melanini
03-08-2007, 11:16 PM
I love this post! Although I have to admit that I'm basically one of the guys. Yea, I may look all feminine, but dont push me, I can fart louder, and spit farther than any man I know...I have also trained my son well! (Dont worry gals, we dont fart or burp infront of ladies, that would just be rude!LOL)thumbs2:
jeffs99dime
03-09-2007, 02:35 AM
I love this post! Although I have to admit that I'm basically one of the guys. Yea, I may look all feminine, but dont push me, I can fart louder, and spit farther than any man I know...I have also trained my son well! (Dont worry gals, we dont fart or burp infront of ladies, that would just be rude!LOL)thumbs2:

you should enter pics of yourself in the "mugshots" thread i started. it's in the chatterbox section. hint, hint. lol
melanini
03-09-2007, 03:15 AM
you should enter pics of yourself in the "mugshots" thread i started. it's in the chatterbox section. hint, hint. lol

Done! Wow, so many groovy lookin people, I love pic threads!
jeffs99dime
03-09-2007, 03:18 AM
Done! Wow, so many groovy lookin people, I love pic threads!

yeah, me too.
Severus
03-09-2007, 06:12 AM
that's true. LOL
Hey Severus you have 2222 posts!


Haha, i did. But hey we cant get off topic! lol
801
03-11-2007, 05:30 AM
The Worlds Shortest Fairytale

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, "Will you marry me?"
The girl said "No," and she lived happily ever after and went shopping,
drank martinis with friends, always had a clean house, never had to cook,
had a closet full of shoes and handbags, stayed skinny,
and was never farted on.
The End.
my gf....
goes shopping all the time for stuff she doesnt need or ever uses
will occasionally drink socially with her friends, but hardly ever with me
is a slob and leaves dirty dishes and dirty clothes all over the place
hardly ever cooks, and its usually just for herself
has closets and dressers and cabinets filled to the brim with clothes and handbags and shoes and makeup and lotion and all kinds of things
was never completely skinny to begin with
and farts on me a hell of a lot more than i fart on her!

plus, she fills the TiVo with weeks worth of crap shows
gets mad if i forget to put the toilet seat down

(and absolutely refuses to put the toilet seat up for me. but thats a debate for another thread.)


and on top of all that... i still love her anyways :41:
Drumachine09
03-11-2007, 05:36 AM
*cracks a whip*

jk
cocoa_pleco
03-11-2007, 05:37 AM
Not me. My gf actually is clean. Im about the messiest person around. I cant sit on any couches, theres xbox, playstation, and nintendo controllers all over, coats, and other crap. I cant even walk around without impailing my foot.