View Full Version : Does this ever happen to you?
Just curious. It's not a huge issue...but when it happens I get very annoyed.
Yesterday I pulled up to the pump at the Gas Station and even let Mr. Middle-Aged with Attitude (who was there 2nd) pull up to my preferred pump rather than make him drive around me...
He commandeers the gas station attendant to fill his car first. Hello?
Then Mr. Teenager with Cool Car pulls up, and the gas station attendant fills HIS car second.
I was there first, now I'm getting served last.
We all go in to pay.
Mr. Teenager asks Mr. Attitude if he was first. Mr. Attitude says 'Yes!". Hello???
Mr. Attitude pays. Then I have to wait until Mr. Teenager's car is filled up (must have had a huge tank since he was started before me, and my car was filled before his).
I didn't say anything. I just fumed. Everytime I say something, I end up looking like a looser. Not sure how to be assertive without being labelled as 'Middle-Age B*tchy Woman* :hmm3grin2orange:
This happened a lot more when I was younger...but it still happens. Dunno what I'm doing wrong. But waiting politely isn't getting me anywhere...
lmhansen
03-03-2009, 05:38 PM
self-serve. no issues...
Sharon
03-03-2009, 05:39 PM
I know what you mean, Rue. I think we always worry about being the B****, and then end up getting walked over!
self-serve. no issues...
Well yes. I can do everything possible to avoid being over-looked, but I'm sure I'll slip up somewhere...
...plus, the gas example was just an example...
I know what you mean, Rue. I think we always worry about being the B****, and then end up getting walked over!
...lol...sad as it is to say, I'm glad I'm not alone! :l19:
Honey Badger 1
03-03-2009, 05:44 PM
i had a similar experience at an electronic store. i was looking for a camera for my daughters birthday. when i selected one i went to the front desk and asked for help then went back and waited. about ten minutes later i saw the camera guy helping someone else who came after me and didnt even know what he wanted. i said can i get this camera. i was asked/told to wait. so i did. about 15 minutes later i noticed the same camera guy helping yet another customer who came in after me. i told him i have been wating for almost half an hour to get a camera. in a very disinterested way he said what camera do you want. thats when i snapped. i said none of them and when you are done with this gentleman you can gather up the rest of the cameras and shove them up your a** no wonder this chain is going out of business. then i turned around and walked out. the good thing is i went to another store and found the same camera for $100 cheaper. i should write a letter thanking the first store for the bad service. i dont know what you are doing wrong but when you find out please let me know so i can stop doing it also. oh and ive never really been concerned with other peoples opinion of me. my opinion and my husbands are the only ones that matter.
Northernguy
03-03-2009, 05:44 PM
Sorry to hear that Rue!
Being polite is not as popular as it used to be!I live in a town of retirees and its a rare to see a smile crack a face.Everybody looks pissed off!lol
Kadina
03-03-2009, 05:48 PM
I know exactly what you are talking about. It doesn't happen at the gas pump because I always pump my own gas, but its happened other places. Ya know what they say, "Nice guys/gals finish last."
mommy1: A thank-you letter to the store for their bad service would be SO funny...you should write one!
NG: Sorry you live in Grumpyville...lol. Maybe someone needs to open a PruneJuice Bar!
I know it's uncool to be polite, but I thought that was more of a trend among younger teenagers...
Apparently not!
lmhansen
03-03-2009, 05:49 PM
Here's the thing. You just labeled two guys "Mr. Attitutde" and "Mr. Teenager", yet you are worried that someone may label you?
If you want to get serviced and there's competition, you either have to be assertive to get serviced first and risk getting labeled, or you're going to have to wait ... You can't heat your kayak and have it too.
And why do you care what some random guy at the gas station or grocery store labels you as? Do you think he care what you label him as?
I know exactly what you are talking about. It doesn't happen at the gas pump because I always pump my own gas, but its happened other places. Ya know what they say, "Nice guys/gals finish last."
You too!
Must be an epidemic.
I have to admit...makes me wish I had magical powers. I wouldn't be too nasty with them...but a flat tire would be an appropriate 'curse' to lay on 'em...
invadertoast
03-03-2009, 05:52 PM
That happens to me at Petco. I'll be standing there in the empty fish deptartment waiting for an employee for like 20 minutes, 4 more customers show up, employee comes, serves me last even if I try to speak up.
I do self serve gas, last time I went to full serve the guy practically climbed inside my car with me to tell me I had pretty eyes.
Honey Badger 1
03-03-2009, 05:53 PM
rue its NEVER uncool to be polite. i always treat every person i meet with respect and my best manners, it just often doesnt end up that way.
Here's the thing. You just labeled two guys "Mr. Attitutde" and "Mr. Teenager", yet you are worried that someone may label you?
If you want to get serviced and there's competition, you either have to be assertive to get serviced first and risk getting labeled, or you're going to have to wait ... You can't heat your kayak and have it too.
And why do you care what some random guy at the gas station or grocery store labels you as? Do you think he care what you label him as?
Yes. I labelled them for the purpose of telling a story.
I'm not worried about being labelled...just pointed out the potential irony.
Were YOU Mr. Attitude by any chance? Feel free to ignore my attempts at humour/conversation if they offend you...
Sharon
03-03-2009, 05:55 PM
Well done!:hmm3grin2orange: :hmm3grin2orange: :hmm3grin2orange:
That happens to me at Petco. I'll be standing there in the empty fish deptartment waiting for an employee for like 20 minutes, 4 more customers show up, employee comes, serves me last even if I try to speak up.
I do self serve gas, last time I went to full serve the guy practically climbed inside my car with me to tell me I had pretty eyes.
Aw...at least your eyes command attention! Have you tried batting them at Petco to get service? thumbs2:
mommy1: I just have the feeling our society is spiraling downwards some days...
Thankfully most of the time it isn't as obvious...
Northernguy
03-03-2009, 06:02 PM
This is Northernguy's wife speaking.
Its okay to let the Middle-aged B-tchy woman come out once in a while,
and if they give you attitude back, TELL THEM TO KISS YOUR &SS!!!!!
if they can have an attitude, SO CAN YOU!!:hmm3grin2orange:
ROFL...
Okay! I'll readjust! :hmm3grin2orange: Thank you!
Kadina
03-03-2009, 06:06 PM
On a positive note though, a few weeks ago I was in a restaurant with my husband and our 2 yr old daughter. She is newly potty trained and when we got to the bathroom there was a line. A young girl, probably 8 or 9, let us go in front of her because the next open stall was the handicapped one. She said we would need the extra room more than her with two of us. I was dumbfounded and thanked her. It is so rare to find polite and respectful children like that in today's society. I wanted to follow that girl back to her table and thank her parents for instilling such thoughtfulness. I bet in 15 years she will be the one going last at the gas station too!
lmhansen
03-03-2009, 06:11 PM
Were YOU Mr. Attitude by any chance?
Noooo. I wouldn't dare disrespect you at the gas station. I'm afraid you'd pick up my Beetle and throw it onto the highway...
Honey Badger 1
03-03-2009, 06:12 PM
AMEN!! Northern Guys wife. :19:
lobsternoob
03-03-2009, 06:30 PM
I try to be more polite to people than they are to me. I live in a town kind of like Northernguy mentioned, a lot of retirees and also rich snobby people. I don't get a lot of smiles or friendly hello's, even when I open a door for someone or just try to greet them with a smile. I'll be honest though, when I look in the mirror I'm not too surprised by that. I dress kinda scummy, and I look well, a bit shady. But when someone does look past that and gives me a smile or a friendly greeting it makes the extra effort well worth it. If they wanna be rude, well let em, and just kill em with kindness :hmm3grin2orange:
Sharon
03-03-2009, 07:08 PM
This is Northernguy's wife speaking.
Its okay to let the Middle-aged B-tchy woman come out once in a while,
and if they give you attitude back, TELL THEM TO KISS YOUR &SS!!!!!
if they can have an attitude, SO CAN YOU!!:hmm3grin2orange:
YAY!!! I'll try that! Funny thing is I have no problem being assertive on some days, but on other days, if you look at me wrong, I cry!!! I'm going to start going out only on my strong days!!!
Being polite is a form of common, basic respect. If someone isn't giving you the same basic respect you're giving them, why validate their assumed superiority by continuing to show them the same level of respect unconditionally?
Tell the attendant that you were there first, and if Mr. Attitude insists that he was first, tell him he'd be an idiot for taking that pump and making you drive around him and ask to be served first so you can leave first and he wont have to drive around you to leave, since you let him have that pump for exactly that reason, since you were really in first.
If you actually have a legitimate complaint, and don't just start screaming your head off, the only people who will call you a b*tch will be the people who don't like the fact that you're not giving them the unearned privileges they're used to other people letting them get away with.
mrs fishpatrick
03-03-2009, 08:05 PM
when something like that happpens I normally say something like :do I look like I am waiting on the bus here or something?:hmm3grin2orange:
or just ask what bus stops here, whem they ask why, they got the answer
lmhansen
03-03-2009, 08:11 PM
People with "entitlement issues" such as the person identified as "Mr. Attitude" isn't going to respond well to being told anything by anyone. As much as I don't like having to give things up for bullies, sometimes it's better to just let it go ...
It doesn't matter what he responds to, it matters what the gas station attendant responds to. In that case, allowing the car in front to exit first seems most logical to avoid any accidents in the vicinity of the gas station, which could hurt business.
Even if the attendant does serve the other guy first, just to get rid of him, at least you got him to admit he's an idiot, whether he actually says it or not.
AABatteries
03-03-2009, 09:21 PM
My brother and I have been completely ignored.
We were at an icecream shop. We were waiting, finally it was our turn. Somebody just walks in they get served. So, I'm just thinking, "lovely." Then its our turn 2 more groups of people walk in, we get ignored. We start waving money in the workers faces. They serve 3 more groups of people. By now 45 minutes have passed and we left. I ended up getting the same flavor, a large, and for less at another shop.
*Sarah*
03-03-2009, 09:27 PM
YOu could just be like me and not care if you're labelled as a "bi+ch"..lol. We were at the Science Center as a family (me, hubby and our 2 young kids), and there were some school classes there. We were waiting in line to try a certain exhibit thing, and some young boys, prob about 10 or so decided that they could just go in front of us. I just said "excuse me, but we were here waiting first, you will have to go behind us". Of course he looked at me like I was a mean old lady, but I don't care. My kids wanted to try it, and my kids need to learn to stick up for themselves, and how will they learn if I let ppl, particularly young kids, walk all over me? I don't think so! lol. People need to learn manners.
MCHRKiller
03-03-2009, 09:53 PM
I learned long ago that basic respect and courtesy will never be given to you automatically from anyone unless you demand it. I was 18 and was shopping for an old 50s truck as I was really into the rockabilly thing and wanted to build a hotrod for my first real car. I went with 2 friends and we had a couple of carlots that sell classics and random used cars, this one lot totally dismissed me as being some punk kid despite the fact I was gonna pay cash that day for the vehicle without financing. That alone shoulda talked, but the old guy insisted I get off his lot he wasnt going to let some kid test-drive everything there. I went to another one, didnt have any problems and found exactly what I wanted and paid for it...I made that salesperson call the other one and tell him he just sold me a 56 F100 and I paid cash for it on the spot.
If its something minor I dont put up a fit like an employee somewhere being bombed by people at the same time. Im generally placid enough to wait even if I was there first as I understand how working with the public is, they pick out their b*tchest people first to avoid trouble. But if it comes to getting cut in an obvious line or something, crap like that just doesnt sit right. Fortunatly it doesnt happen often but it did happen once at a walmart by a woman who had a FULL huge buggy she was trying to go threw the express lane and I had like 3 items that were already on the belt. I was standing in the normal checkout area being a fatkid looking at candy while I waited and she cut in through a gap between aisles; strategic move Ill give her that, but hey she coulda asked if I was in-line especially since I didnt have much and didnt even have a cart. That kinda peeved me off as I had been standing there for an eternity waiting on some other lady infront of me to pay for her stuff in change. I just waited on the line jumping woman to get about half her stuff up there and was like "are you gonna pay for my stuff to?" she looked at me real hateful and said "no" and I was like "well its already up there and been rang up because you cut infront of me so I guess you did" I just walked around and went down the other lane and took my bag and left.
Sharon
03-03-2009, 10:25 PM
Now, that's priceless!!!:hmm3grin2orange:
Noooo. I wouldn't dare disrespect you at the gas station. I'm afraid you'd pick up my Beetle and throw it onto the highway...
Excellent! Just the type of fear I dream of instilling in people I meet! :hmm3grin2orange:
Kadina: I also think it's great to reward polite behaviour, esp. to kids. We don't do enough of that. Doesn't have to be anything major, a smile, or thumb's up is often appreciated!
I feel MUCH better knowing I'm not alone in being overlooked. Thanks for your stories everyone! thumbs2:
And I have taken individuals to task - like the woman who blew by me while I was clearly waiting (with signal on) for a parking spot - and took my spot! (I had left extra room for turning into the spot since I had the truck, she had a mini-car) So we had a minor altercation (no name calling - I won't do that) but it ruined my day.
Somedays I just wish I had that 'presence' that keeps me in the foreground instead of the non-presence that has me blending in with the woodwork.
Northernguy
03-04-2009, 04:51 PM
LOL Put bigger tires on your truck with a nice loud Magna Flow exhaust and some nice bush bars.They tend to get out of the way in a hurry if you rev the engine a bit!:hmm3grin2orange:
Heh! Look out world! Crazy lady tryin' to park! :hmm3grin2orange:
MCHRKiller
03-04-2009, 05:10 PM
lol! You handle that whole stealing the place thing with alot more grace than I do. Usually if somebody does that to me especially if its a *really* good spot...they are greated by a horn and the finger. One time traffic was really clustered together so it took me awhile to get out of the aisle and the same guy that took my place also walked infront of me going across the parking lot. Lets just say he ended up about crapping his pants because I got real close to him before stopping. I dont think its the fact you dont have "presence" whatever that is, I think its just the fact your not a rude SOB and generally courteous, people like that are in short supply so the rest just kind of run over ya because theyre in their own little self absorbed bubble.
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