Three word story

[Dennis Bissett]

pygmies for company

[Stlouisfish]

who came bringing...

[fishmommie]

tea laced with

[Goes to 11!]

Multiple powerful entheogens...

[fishmommie]

generating graphic dreams

[Goes to 11!]

indistinguishable from reality...

[Dennis Bissett]

generated by illicit

[fishmommie]

black market mushrooms

[Slaphppy7]

from cow poo

[fishmommie]

shaped like elephants

[mommy1]

and floated around...

[gronlaura]

in my mind

[mommy1]

Like no other...

[gronlaura]

dream ever has

[fishmommie]

manifested causing great....

[mommy1]

turmoil and strife...

[gronlaura]

while I'm singing

[mommy1]

show tunes loudly...

[fishmommie]

while thousands cheer

[mommy1]

the floating elephants...

[fishmommie]

that trumpet wildly...

[mommy1]

with the tunes...

[fishmommie]

from Westside Story...

[HODOR]

consume moldy cheeses...

[mommy1]

Out of a...

[KingFisher]

bag of oreos...

[mommy1]

every which way...

[Surfdog]

They're still great

[eltylT]

Blue Oyster Cult

[Surfdog]

Members take Geritol.

[KevinVA]

to stay regular...

[FrozenTundra]

drink your Ovaltine

[gronlaura]

and stay close

[KevinVA]

to the bathroom...

[gronlaura]

or you will

[FrozenTundra]

get skid marks

[DeboraBremner]

or far worse....

[1Sarah]

Like butt hives

[FrozenTundra]

from dried poo....

[1Sarah]

Suddenly he felt

[DeboraBremner]

try using cream

[pRED]

Butt I'm busy....

[fishmommie]

whining about my

[FrozenTundra]

my lack of

[1Sarah]

Experience with huge

[pRED]

South American cichlids

[FrozenTundra]

in my tank.

[pRED]

Could someone please....

[1Sarah]

Get this cat

[jeffs99dime]

off my head

[1Sarah]

It has fleas!

[FrozenTundra]

and sharp claws.

[KevinVA]

and sheds profusely.

[FrozenTundra]

causing major sneezing

[DeboraBremner]

and nose running

[KevinVA]

still I persevered

[Surfdog]

And suffered bravely

[KevinVA]

for who else

[pRED]

would take such

[KevinVA]

extreme measures to

[FrozenTundra]

find my pair

[KevinVA]

of oven mits

[1Sarah]

Under the broken

[KevinVA]

cabinet I usually

[Triton]

store the spices

[FrozenTundra]

to season my

[gronlaura]

fish's pot roast

[FrozenTundra]

that is served

[eltylT]

With or without

[KevinVA]

garlic for added

[Surfdog]

Repellence and halitosis.

[gronlaura]

nutritional value and

[pRED]

such. This day

[1Sarah]

Flavour. The phone

[Surfdog]

Is ringing again!

[1Sarah]

I answer it

[FrozenTundra]

and hear nothing

[Surfdog]

Another prank call?

[FrozenTundra]

or a telemarketer?

[1Sarah]

Suddenly someone whispers

[pRED]

"I am ready....

[1Sarah]

"For you to...

[FrozenTundra]

poke the crazy

[gronlaura]

I don't understand

[pRED]

why she said

[KevinVA]

"Ubermench!!!" but she

[gronlaura]

apparently meant that

[Surfdog]

To be hurtful....

[KevinVA]

So I threw

[1Sarah]

A raging tantrum

[KevinVA]

at which point

[Surfdog]

I started sobbing...

[eltylT]

then I thought....

[KevinVA]

I might as

[fishmommie]

well stomp around ....

[Surfdog]

To get attention.....

[KevinVA]

from the local

[fishmommie]

police who complimented....

[KevinVA]

my stomping abilities

[FrozenTundra]

but still gave

[Surfdog]

Me a ticket....

[1Sarah]

For "obnoxious stomping"

[fishmommie]

so I screamed ....

[FrozenTundra]

and ran like

[KevinVA]

the wind, until

[FrozenTundra]

I spotted a

[KevinVA]

ten foot toad

[fishmommie]

with buck teeth.......

[KevinVA]

and eyes that

[FrozenTundra]

were crossed like

[1Sarah]

It was confused

[fishmommie]

or maybe senile ....

[KevinVA]

but either way

[1Sarah]

I had to....

[gronlaura]

touch his face

[pRED]

and 'slap' his

[Surfdog]

Lower body area

[FrozenTundra]

with a slow

[fishmommie]

cherry licorice whip

[FrozenTundra]

that doubles as

[fishmommie]

Christmas tree garland...

[FrozenTundra]

that shines really

[fishmommie]

bright if you ....

[FrozenTundra]

turn the power

[pRED]

up to eleven..

[fishmommie]

being careful not ....

[FrozenTundra]

to blow the

[fishmommie]

roof made of

[FrozenTundra]

twigs and sticks

[KevinVA]

...which is another

[1Sarah]

Story. Mmm chocolate

[FrozenTundra]

covered strawberries make

[1Sarah]

Delicious man bait

[FrozenTundra]

for those lonely

[KevinVA]

bar treading souls

[FrozenTundra]

that can't stop

[KevinVA]

goggling over chocolate

[FrozenTundra]

and ice cream

[1Sarah]

Flavoured lollipops that

[KevinVA]

smelled of sweet

[1Sarah]

Sweet candy corn

[fishmommie]

and bear bait ....

[FrozenTundra]

to get those

[1Sarah]

I decide to

[KevinVA]

head on down

[FrozenTundra]

to contestant row

[KevinVA]

so i can...

[FrozenTundra]

bid on fantastic

[1Sarah]

Prizes and meet

[fishmommie]

Sasquatch or Godzilla

[FrozenTundra]

or other mythical

[Surfdog]

And literary characters.

[KevinVA]

And that's when....

[fishmommie]

Shrek sneezed and

[FrozenTundra]

blew donkey away

[gronlaura]

Poor donkey, he

[FrozenTundra]

can't stay quiet

[KevinVA]

for even a

[1Sarah]

Or Drew Carey

[gronlaura]

I'm confused now

[KevinVA]

so I've decided...

[1Sarah]

To laugh loudly

[KevinVA]

and run away

[FrozenTundra]

with hands waving

[KevinVA]

like a little

[gronlaura]

bug flying thru

[FrozenTundra]

causing people to

[fishmommie]

applaud while eating ...

[FrozenTundra]

buttered movie popcorn

[gronlaura]

and creating a

[fishmommie]

spectacle much like ....

[gronlaura]

Cecil B DeMille (is that 3 words?)

[1Sarah]

Whoever that is...

[fishmommie]

or Steven Speilburg (sp)

[KevinVA]

while kissing butt

[1Sarah]

Like it's 1999....

[KevinVA]

After all that...

[FrozenTundra]

we still got

[KevinVA]

a bad case

[FrozenTundra]

multiple tank syndrome

[Surfdog]

Effects us all

[FrozenTundra]

with no hope

[1Sarah]

Like Justin Bieber

[FrozenTundra]

who just got

[1Sarah]

Slapped by a

[FrozenTundra]

pink elephant mascot

[KevinVA]

because he's such

[FrozenTundra]

a wannabe thug

[KevinVA]

with undescended testicles

[1Sarah]

And the smallest

[FrozenTundra]

that will need

[KevinVA]

to be shipped

[pRED]

UPS to Korea

[KevinVA]

That way, we

[eltylT]

Can upgrade to....

[KevinVA]

a better model

[FrozenTundra]

which isn't hard

[KevinVA]

given the subject

[FrozenTundra]

is so terrible.

[KevinVA]

Thank goodness the

[FrozenTundra]

new guy can't

[pRED]

sing and dance

[KevinVA]

so we're in

[fishmommie]

for a treat ....

[FrozenTundra]

of non faked

[KevinVA]

lip-syncing extravagance

[FrozenTundra]

unlike the recent

[1Sarah]

Miley Cyrus spectacle

[FrozenTundra]

or presidential inauguration

[KevinVA]

where even idiots

[FrozenTundra]

make the whitehouse

[Surfdog]

And especially Congress

[KevinVA]

appear dumber than

[FrozenTundra]

a box of....

[Surfdog]

One penny nails

[fishmommie]

covered in slime

[FrozenTundra]

from the icebox

[Surfdog]

In the garage...

[FrozenTundra]

with the door

[1Sarah]

Closed. I jumped

[FrozenTundra]

when I seen.....

[eltylT]

What appeared to

[KevinVA]

be my Southern

[1Sarah]

Kangapandawiesel take a

[KevinVA]

dip in the

[FrozenTundra]

big hot tub...

[eltylT]

that was so ....

[1Sarah]

Clogged with fur

[bhupeshkhanna]

white in color

[KevinVA]

that it appeared

[FrozenTundra]

almost snow like

[gronlaura]

even though the

[Surfdog]

Water was steaming

[FrozenTundra]

from slime covered

[KevinVA]

tantos of doom

[Surfdog]

Even so I.......

[fishmommie]

drank the water ...

[KevinVA]

and grew violently

[Triton]

Into a huge....

[fishmommie]

scaly, six-legged ....

[Triton]

Viscous Man eating

[KevinVA]

sugar glider of

[1Sarah]

Death! I was

[fishmommie]

ravenous which required

[KevinVA]

sustenance of utmost

[fishmommie]

decadence like chocolate

[FrozenTundra]

covered strawberries and

[fishmommie]

gator-aide spiked with

[KevinVA]

black beard's special

[fishmommie]

Aquavite stolen from