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View Full Version : richberster what's your sign jokes


Lady Hobbs
01-09-2008, 11:31 PM
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Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of
those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks
out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said,
"Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. said, "Nope. I was
driving around and those other three just swelled right up on
me. Here's your sign."

A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine,
we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big 'ol
stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all
catch all them fish?" "Nope - Talked 'em into giving up.
Here's your sign."

It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of
boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My
friend comes over and says "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just
pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes
it takes. Here's your sign."


I learned to drive an 18 wheeler in my days of
adventure. Wouldn't ya know I misjudged the height of
a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get it
out no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and
eventually a local cop shows up to take the report.
He went through his basic questioning. No problem. I
thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign...
until he says "So..is your truck stuck?" I couldn't
help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig,
then back to him and said, "No I'm delivering a bridge
...Here's your sign!".

I'm in high school, and i was walking to my 6th period class the other day. When i get there (being the first one there) i pull on the door to find it locked. THe drapes are closed, so i can't see if anyone is inside, so just to be sure, i start pounding on the door. At that moment the principle walks by the classroom with keys and says "are you locked out?" I said "nope,the door made fun of my mom, i was just giving him a beating for it. Here's your sign."

Rich.......just had to do it. Your thread reminded me of these.

Drumachine09
01-09-2008, 11:59 PM
HAHA!

I laughed at the bridge one!

richberstler
01-10-2008, 12:03 AM
Thats funny, I was thinking the same thing when I first started the thread, which is when I made the actual poll question "star sign" lol...

Nothing wrong with a little Bill Engvall to brighten our day!

crackatinny
01-10-2008, 12:20 AM
Classic Bill Engvell :thumb:

crackatinny
01-10-2008, 12:31 AM
Heres a link to the youtube versions by Bill Engvall (better known as Mater)

Standard version
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Xmas version
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Lady Hobbs
01-10-2008, 01:01 AM
He really is funny as heck. I like him too.

crackatinny
01-10-2008, 01:13 AM
Yep, him and Larry the cable guy from blue collar comedy, I love that southern drawl :ezpi_wink1:

richberstler
01-10-2008, 01:21 AM
Yep, him and Larry the cable guy from blue collar comedy, I love that southern drawl :ezpi_wink1:

Bill is my fav from the tour, but I have to say Ron White is my #2.

Ty
01-10-2008, 05:34 AM
ummm....mater was lary the cable guy.....

crackatinny
01-10-2008, 05:36 AM
ummm....mater was lary the cable guy.....

Thats who I thought it was to, but I'm nearly sure in the end credits it says Bill Engvell, sure sounds more like Larry.

Ty
01-10-2008, 05:44 AM
Im not sure if bill was in the movie or not, I have not seen it for a while, but either way, they are a funny bunch of guys!

mitcore
01-10-2008, 09:00 AM
LOL they are great

i dont get the heres your sign bit though