H2O
11-13-2007, 08:44 PM
Which do you like...
1. Hello. This is --?--'s answering machine, Marvin, and I'm so depressed. I have 50,000 times the memory capacity of my owner, but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name and number after the beep. Here comes the beep, how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding. BEEP
2. Rod Serling imitation: You're dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world without time, where sound collides with color and shadows explode. You see a signpost up ahead -- this is no ordinary telephone answering device... You have reached, "The Twilight Phone". BEEP
3. The President is not in his office at this time. Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password. BEEP
4. To the Batmobile! Let's go! Atomic batteries to power! Turbines to speed! Roger, ready to move out! (Theme music from Batman; reduce to background.) As you can see, I'm off making Montreal a safer place' to live. So if you'll leave a message after the tone, I'll get back to you as soon as justice is served. Bye-bye! (Music continues.) BEEP
5. Imitating Mr. Rogers: Hello. I'm in the Neighborhood of Make Believe right now, so I can't come to the phone. Can you leave your name and number when you hear the sound of the tone? Sure... I knew you could. BEEP
6. Clint Eastwood voice: Go ahead, make my day. Leave a message. BEEP
7. In Joe Friday voice: This is Constable Augie of the Canadian Security and Intelligence Service. The phone line you have just dialed is currently under investigation on a warrant issued by the Attorney General of Canada. To facilitate our investigation, we would appreciate you leaving your name, number, a brief message, and any affiliations you may have made now, or in the past, with communist or terrorist organizations. Thank you. BEEP
8. Hi. This is --?--. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
9. Please leave your name and number -- But first, a short algebra quiz: How much is 5Q + 5Q? ------------pause------------- You're welcome! BEEP
10. (Oriental voice:) Hello, you have reached honorable --?--'s residence. I, Kato, will go and get honorable --?--. (Godzilla scream.) Oh no! Godzilla coming! Please leave name and number at gong and --?-- will call back if house still here. BEEP
1. Hello. This is --?--'s answering machine, Marvin, and I'm so depressed. I have 50,000 times the memory capacity of my owner, but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name and number after the beep. Here comes the beep, how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding. BEEP
2. Rod Serling imitation: You're dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world without time, where sound collides with color and shadows explode. You see a signpost up ahead -- this is no ordinary telephone answering device... You have reached, "The Twilight Phone". BEEP
3. The President is not in his office at this time. Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password. BEEP
4. To the Batmobile! Let's go! Atomic batteries to power! Turbines to speed! Roger, ready to move out! (Theme music from Batman; reduce to background.) As you can see, I'm off making Montreal a safer place' to live. So if you'll leave a message after the tone, I'll get back to you as soon as justice is served. Bye-bye! (Music continues.) BEEP
5. Imitating Mr. Rogers: Hello. I'm in the Neighborhood of Make Believe right now, so I can't come to the phone. Can you leave your name and number when you hear the sound of the tone? Sure... I knew you could. BEEP
6. Clint Eastwood voice: Go ahead, make my day. Leave a message. BEEP
7. In Joe Friday voice: This is Constable Augie of the Canadian Security and Intelligence Service. The phone line you have just dialed is currently under investigation on a warrant issued by the Attorney General of Canada. To facilitate our investigation, we would appreciate you leaving your name, number, a brief message, and any affiliations you may have made now, or in the past, with communist or terrorist organizations. Thank you. BEEP
8. Hi. This is --?--. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
9. Please leave your name and number -- But first, a short algebra quiz: How much is 5Q + 5Q? ------------pause------------- You're welcome! BEEP
10. (Oriental voice:) Hello, you have reached honorable --?--'s residence. I, Kato, will go and get honorable --?--. (Godzilla scream.) Oh no! Godzilla coming! Please leave name and number at gong and --?-- will call back if house still here. BEEP